Finally

well we finally got the official okay that the project we have been working on for the last couple months was done to 100%. it makes me feel like i accomplished something lol. but this would be the second project i have worked on my first one was almost the same things which was building 3 rooms from framing to drywall to ceiling work to painting to trim the whole nine yards. but this one was we had 2 teams k-span 1,k-span 2 cuz we had to renovate 2 k-spans easy enough. but this time we did insulation, steel framing, gypsum board, rewire the whole building, drop-ceiling, light fixtures...so on so forth it was similar but new at the same time it was a good experience for the most part. but we got done a couple days ago and now we are just kinda of sitting around....cant complain getting paid to lay in bed. but it feels good to have accomplished this project. i have learned more on leadership than anything. i would have to say that if u have shitty leaders who just degrade you and make u feel like shit no one will respect them. cuz for one yes we are in the military but we are not numbers we are people too, we do what we are told and we do it very well but when you tell someone to do something and we do it and complete something a month ahead of schedule and it looks perfect and it is perfect a, " hey you did a good job keep up the good work." but instead of that u know what we got from our chain of command, "wow that shit is fucked up u guys are fucking stupid why the fuck are u guys even on this detachment.".....yeah, the only thing we heard from them had been negative and degrading and they wonder why we don't respect them, we have been here for a good 2 months give or take a few days but we haven't heard a single positive thing from them, so a note to everyone who reads this, before u talk to someone who bust there ass day in and day out and they do it to prove that they are not a piece of shit, don't degrade them and if they did fuck up use some constructive criticism not you fucked up you piece of shit...if you stay positive as a leader your crew will put out allot more work and respect u as a leader, superior and as a person. and respect these days i would have to say is hard to come by, i think at least. i know it is hard to respect someone who doesn't respect you, but they usually dont respect you because you have yet to prove yourself by showing them the same courtesy and 99% of the time you get out what you put in. sometimes it takes a bigger man to shut his mouth and just do it and take the first step into showing respect. but bottom line in this is in the world there will always be one above you, that one asshole, that one guy who thinks he is the biggest baddest person in the world, but all u can do i shake your head and when u get that postion of authority or you are in his shoes don't make the mistakes he did.

one of those days

had one of those days today where everything made u mad. well the whole day wasn't like that it started off good i woke up to good music took a shower and shaved and listen to metal all the way to work and it was awesome. but then idk everything started making me mad and then u know u have one of these days, because u start getting irratated but then u start thinking and well thinking makes it worse and u get even more mad and then it just build and u are just so fustrated that u dont know what to think anymore. like i cared so much about my career and now i just want to do my 5 years, during my five years go to college for business get at least a bachelors then get out of the navy then go to an auto-body school to open up my own chop shop/repair shop. but see that isn't whats bothering me, what is bothering me is is where did my motivation go, where did my commitment go to succeed in the navy and go far in this field, where did it go i cant figure it out, but the reasons i came up with didn't make sense, cuz i work with some idiots and assholes but everywhere u go u will have that so u cant stop that u just have to smile and nod ur head and move on, so that i just learn to deal with and drama u can never escape drama its just life and thats not going to change so u just gotta do the same thing so that doesn't bother me. so with that said i cant figure it out like the only time i am genuinely happy is when i am in the gym bettering myself physically its like my new haven but when i leave the gym it goes out the window and i get upset again. so at this point i have no idea what to think. im just confused as fuck right now and pissed and aggravated and pretty much a mix of everything

another chance

well this one im pretty sure everyone has had an incident like this where u fuck up and u dont relieze what u lost till it is actually gone well i had my first true experience of this and it sucks cuz it took so long to relieze that i lost one of the best things i had and it was cuz i was to scared lol it sux to admit to it but i fucked up but i got back up on the horse and took the situation head on and i got another chance and now im trying everything possiable to not fuck up and make things work. but i guess everyone is human and makes a mistake. im just happy i got another chance to make this work. that is what i intend on doing, doing everythin in my power and never giving up again cuz i now relize that its prolly the best thing i have. i can honestly say i am happy for a first time in a long time i mean ive always been happy but not like this kind of happy. but i guess the moral of this is take everything head on and nvr back down and stay strong and investe in what u want and u will get what u put into it.

update

well its been awhile again i just haven't found that much time to blog or find things to blog about well last i put i was in Spain now i am in israel fun fun we are doing some renovation projects for the Israel air force its alot of work but i enjoy any kinda of work were at the end of the day u feel accomplished and when u take ur boots off its the best feeling in the world then go to the gym lol but yeah i love hard work and taking pride in my things. but its been a good deployment so far cant complain to much except being away from the family but they will always be there for me so that helps but when your out on your own for the first year well at least it was difficult same of the times and u fall but what counts is when u get back up so far i would have to say i am doing pretty good. but i have seen 2 countries in 1 year well soon to be three cuz we are getting ready to go see Greece sometime on our way back to battalion so that should be fun. but spain is a good vacation spot is beautiful people are somewhat nice they dont like Americans to much maybe its cuz we drink alot cuz there were alot of drunk Americans there and it kinda kills it but it is a great and highly recommended spot when they said ur going to Israel i was like aahhh fuck desert sun hot fml but actually it is a tropical desert place further south more desert further north more tropical kinda feeling thing going on and alot of history. Israel is another great spot recommended but we got to see some sites but we mostly work but that is my update.

been awhile again

i pretty much say fuck being the nice guy cuz being the nice guy dosnt always work i mean sometimes it does dont get me wrong but most of the time u get shit on. i had some one tell me today that they hate there life so much right now. so since the person is talking to me i asked them why do u hate ur life so much right now what happened that is so wrong. idk im just a bad person......okay ummm sorry to tell u this but that isnt a good reason at all. cuz if they think they are a bad person then okay they are making there own lives shit. but everyone has a good side and a bad side no one is perfectly good or perfectly bad or perfect in between everyone is different but they still both sides. and then the person said that life sux. my response was life is what u make it if u look at all the negatives u will think nothing but negative and therefore hate life and think it sux. no matter how bad shit gets 1. someone out in the world has it worse than u and that's a fucking giving and for everyone that thinks that oh no i have the worst fucking life think again because ask yourself do u have a roof over ur head? do u have food? do u have people who love u? do u have friends? do u have good days but ur just having a shitty day and tomorrow could be different? and after that u still think oh this guy is retarded listen u could be paralyzed from the neck down, blind, and deaf. then on top of that u have no family no friends no there to help u that u know i mean someone can be helping u but have never heard there voice or seen them. and then u go hungry almost everyday and u have no roof over your head and everyone hates u and this repeats everyday. i would say that would sux more than a fucking break up with someone then being yelled at by a parent and so on so forth u get the point. what i am trying to say is if u can stay positive and smile over the little things life is easier and funner and it doesn't seem as bad. life in general can get hard and tough and it does suck but it can be worst stay positive and itll make ur life happier lol i think so at least it seems to work for me but i guess not all people can see that like i can. but back to the nice guy think so i was the nice guy and they told me that i was fucking stupid for believing that and i have no idea what life is. mother fucker i am still wet behind the ears but i know life can be rough and it can be fun if u make it that way oh and not to mention the person was 1 year older than me that made it better not mother fucker u are 1 year older than me so u know about as much as i do. but i guess people are not perfect needless to say this person pretty much said that im fucking retarded and i am stupid for thinking this way. but each to there own moral of the story is everyone is different and has there own opinions so don't judge them cuz when u judge them u are being judged and it doesn't feel very well to be labeled as an asshole for y0ur beliefs

it has been awhile

it has been awhile since i have last posted and during that period i have come to the conclusion that its the same shit but a diffrent day i mean yeah minor changes in the routine. im not saying life is boring but i kinda appreciate that its the same because when life throws that curve ball at u and its a huge change in your everyday life your like "holy shit what the fuck was that i was not expecting that at all that was fucking crazy damn"(that is my personal quote) lol i thought that was funny lol but i had one of those huge changes and some people think that it may not be a huge change, but to me it was so if u are one that is reading this and ur like this guy dosnt know what a huge change is i have a few words for you go fuck yourself. but the change that happend to me i started lifting again and well ive been lifting for 4 weeks everyday and i feel like i have changed and i look like i have changed and i was like holy shit i feel fucking amazing. i thought that was a plus.

now for my ranting that i think is a good rant this time but i hate it when people tell me that i dont know what a change is or i dont know a curve ball from life well i say fuck u buddy cuz i was 17 i joined the fucking navy i left a girlfriend(ex) who i was dating for a long time, i left the 3 most important people to me that i have known my whole life and i love with all my heart cuz they will never leave my side and that is my dad my mom and my brother. im pretty sure since u know i havnt been away from home or away from them for a long period of time joing the navy was huge cuz i left for bootcamp and i called them maybe 3 times and saw them for 4-5 days one or the other and then i didnt see them again for 3 months i think or 2 i think i was 3 but the point being that was a huge fucking change for me i know i am a young buck but come on i know a huge fucking change when it hits me. and i dont need a fucking novel when i ask a simple question that needs a simple answer cuz if i ask the question and ur response is well i remember when...... i am prolly going to ignore u cuz i dont want some fucking biography of yourself if i wanted that i would ask so everyone who tries to tell a novel for a question shut the fuck up cuz it is really fucking innoying to me. and plus there is 3 people who i dont care if they do that cuz they tell it to me for my own good and thats my mom, dad, and brother. but everyone else come on.